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| Position |  |
The Good Guys | Eating Poop @ The Eagles Parade |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB | 
|
Carson Wentz - MIN | 6.32 | 28.48 | Brock Purdy - SF | 
|
| RB | 
|
Rhamondre Stevenson - NE | 3.6 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN | 
|
| RB | 
|
Kaelon Black - SF | 2.5 | 14.2 | Breece Hall - NYJ | 
|
| WR | 
|
Stefon Diggs - WSH | 21.7 | 39.5 | Davante Adams - LAR | 
|
| WR | 
|
Malik Washington - MIA | 15.6 | 8.4 | Mike Evans - SF | 
|
| WR | 
|
Quentin Johnston - LAC | 2.4 | 20.5 | Denzel Boston - CLE | 
|
| TE | 
|
Hunter Henry - NE | 7 | 26 | Dalton Schultz - HOU | 
|
| K | 
|
Trey Smack - GB | 8 | 14 | Spencer Shrader - IND | 
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 4 | LA Chargers - | ||
| Total | 71.12 | 165.58 | ||||
| Winner | Eating Poop @ The Eagles Parade (+94.46) | |||||
| Position | |
Zurich Fins | H-O-T-T-O-DEEBO | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Brock Purdy - SF | 28.48 | 14.74 | Jayden Daniels - WSH | 
|
| RB | 
|
Bucky Irving - TB | 13 | 3.6 | J.K. Dobbins - DEN | 
|
| RB | 
|
David Montgomery - HOU | 4.4 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN |
|
| WR | 
|
DJ Moore - BUF | -0.1 | -0.1 | DJ Moore - BUF |
|
| WR |
|
Mike Evans - SF | 8.4 | 9.4 | Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF | 
|
| WR | 
|
Parker Washington - JAX | 16.8 | 8.5 | Justin Jefferson - MIN | 
|
| TE | 
|
Dalton Kincaid - BUF | 22.5 | 10.9 | Mark Andrews - BAL | 
|
| K | 
|
Cameron Dicker - LAC | 0 | 16 | Chase McLaughlin - TB | 
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 4 | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | ||
| Total | 97.48 | 77.54 | ||||
| Winner | Zurich Fins (+19.94) | |||||
| Position |  |
Daejon’s Deceivers | All You Need is (Jeremiyah) Love | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB | 
|
Drake Maye - NE | 8.02 | 12.18 | Baker Mayfield - TB | 
|
| RB |
|
J.K. Dobbins - DEN | 3.6 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN |
|
| RB | 
|
Jaylen Warren - PIT | 9.7 | 3.6 | J.K. Dobbins - DEN |
|
| WR | 
|
Romeo Doubs - NE | 12.6 | 6.7 | DK Metcalf - PIT | 
|
| WR |
|
Stefon Diggs - WSH | 21.7 | 21.7 | Stefon Diggs - WSH |
|
| WR |
|
Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF | 9.4 | 12.6 | Romeo Doubs - NE |
|
| TE |
|
Mark Andrews - BAL | 10.9 | 26 | Dalton Schultz - HOU |
|
| K | 
|
Jason Myers - SEA | 7 | 5 | Ka'imi Fairbairn - HOU | 
|
| DEF | Philadelphia Eagles - | 4 | 4 | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | ||
| Total | 86.92 | 102.28 | ||||
| Winner | All You Need is (Jeremiyah) Love (+15.36) | |||||
| Position |  |
Ocean’s 9 | Beaver Blitz |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jayden Daniels - WSH | 14.74 | 13.8 | Jordan Love - GB | 
|
| RB |
|
Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN | 10.5 | 7.1 | Travis Etienne Jr. - NO | 
|
| RB | 
|
Javonte Williams - DAL | 8 | 3 | Saquon Barkley - PHI | 
|
| WR |
|
Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF | 9.4 | 20.5 | Denzel Boston - CLE |
|
| WR | 
|
Devaughn Vele - NO | 11.4 | 6.2 | Luther Burden III - CHI | 
|
| WR |
|
DJ Moore - BUF | -0.1 | 10.3 | Emeka Egbuka - TB | 
|
| TE | 
|
Michael Mayer - LV | 5.3 | 0 | Cole Turner - MIA | 
|
| K | 
|
Cam Little - JAX | 6 | 6 | Andy Borregales - NE | 
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 9 | Pittsburgh Steelers - | ||
| Total | 69.24 | 75.9 | ||||
| Winner | Beaver Blitz (+6.66) | |||||
| Position | |
Woke Up and Chose Violence | Game of Lan |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jayden Daniels - WSH | 14.74 | 28.48 | Brock Purdy - SF |
|
| RB |
|
David Montgomery - HOU | 4.4 | 15.7 | Kyren Williams - LAR | 
|
| RB | 
|
Jadarian Price - SEA | 5 | 7.8 | Kyle Monangai - CHI | 
|
| WR |
|
Emeka Egbuka - TB | 10.3 | 12.6 | Romeo Doubs - NE |
|
| WR | 
|
Jalen Coker - CAR | 14.6 | 10.3 | Emeka Egbuka - TB |
|
| WR |
|
Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF | 9.4 | 9.8 | Matthew Golden - GB | 
|
| TE | 
|
Tucker Kraft - GB | 3.5 | 26 | Dalton Schultz - HOU |
|
| K | 
|
Harrison Butker - KC | 15 | 7 | Jason Myers - SEA |
|
| DEF | Philadelphia Eagles - | 4 | 1 | Kansas City Chiefs - | ||
| Total | 80.94 | 118.68 | ||||
| Winner | Game of Lan (+37.74) | |||||
| Position | |
The Culver’s Less Traveled By | Jordan Loves Younghoes | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jayden Daniels - WSH | 14.74 | 12.18 | Baker Mayfield - TB |
|
| RB |
|
Bucky Irving - TB | 13 | 9.5 | Cam Skattebo - NYG | 
|
| RB | 
|
Jonathan Taylor - IND | 29.2 | 4.4 | David Montgomery - HOU |
|
| WR | 
|
Garrett Wilson - NYJ | 16.7 | 2.1 | Alec Pierce - IND | 
|
| WR |
|
Emeka Egbuka - TB | 10.3 | 21.7 | Stefon Diggs - WSH |
|
| WR | 
|
Chris Olave - NO | 22.6 | 9.4 | Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF |
|
| TE | 
|
Colston Loveland - CHI | 1.3 | 17.2 | Sam LaPorta - DET | 
|
| K |
|
Ka'imi Fairbairn - HOU | 5 | 16 | Chase McLaughlin - TB |
|
| DEF | Philadelphia Eagles - | 4 | 4 | LA Chargers - | ||
| Total | 116.84 | 96.48 | ||||
| Winner | The Culver’s Less Traveled By (+20.36) | |||||
| Position | |
Who’s Nailin’ Jalen? | Freakofnature | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jayden Daniels - WSH | 14.74 | 7.72 | Caleb Williams - CHI | 
|
| RB | 
|
Brian Robinson Jr. - ATL | 8.7 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN |
|
| RB |
|
Kyren Williams - LAR | 15.7 | 4.4 | David Montgomery - HOU |
|
| WR |
|
Davante Adams - LAR | 39.5 | 14.1 | Christian Watson - GB | 
|
| WR | 
|
Kayshon Boutte - HOU | 6.7 | 10 | George Pickens - DAL | 
|
| WR | 
|
Mack Hollins - NE | 3.8 | 7.3 | Rome Odunze - CHI | 
|
| TE |
|
Colston Loveland - CHI | 1.3 | 1.3 | Colston Loveland - CHI |
|
| K | 
|
Cairo Santos - CHI | 0 | 3 | Tyler Loop - BAL | 
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 4 | Philadelphia Eagles - | ||
| Total | 94.44 | 62.32 | ||||
| Winner | Who’s Nailin’ Jalen? (+32.12) | |||||
| Position |  |
Southport Skegs | hancocky bastards | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB | 
|
Dak Prescott - DAL | 29.76 | 29.76 | Dak Prescott - DAL |
|
| RB | 
|
Christian McCaffrey - SF | 22.6 | 8 | Javonte Williams - DAL |
|
| RB | 
|
Kenneth Walker III - KC | 23.8 | 15.7 | Kyren Williams - LAR |
|
| WR |
|
Davante Adams - LAR | 39.5 | 10 | George Pickens - DAL |
|
| WR | 
|
CeeDee Lamb - DAL | 35.3 | 39.5 | Davante Adams - LAR |
|
| WR | 
|
Terry McLaurin - WSH | 7 | 1.1 | Malik Nabers - NYG | 
|
| TE | 
|
George Kittle - SF | 18 | 18.1 | Trey McBride - ARI | 
|
| K |
|
Harrison Butker - KC | 15 | 7 | Jason Myers - SEA |
|
| DEF | Denver Broncos - | 11 | 12 | Seattle Seahawks - | ||
| Total | 201.96 | 141.16 | ||||
| Winner | Southport Skegs (+60.8) | |||||
| Position | |
Historically Bad at This | Up!!! |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jayden Daniels - WSH | 14.74 | 28.48 | Brock Purdy - SF |
|
| RB |
|
Travis Etienne Jr. - NO | 7.1 | 8 | Javonte Williams - DAL |
|
| RB |
|
Javonte Williams - DAL | 8 | 5 | Jadarian Price - SEA |
|
| WR | 
|
Antonio Williams - WSH | 5.4 | 10 | George Pickens - DAL |
|
| WR | 
|
Khalil Shakir - BUF | 7.9 | 21.7 | Stefon Diggs - WSH |
|
| WR | 
|
Dontayvion Wicks - PHI | 12.4 | 2.1 | Alec Pierce - IND |
|
| TE | 
|
Pat Freiermuth - PIT | 7.4 | 8.3 | Isaiah Likely - NYG | 
|
| K | 
|
Jake Elliott - PHI | 8 | 0 | Cameron Dicker - LAC |
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 12 | Seattle Seahawks - | ||
| Total | 74.94 | 95.58 | ||||
| Winner | Up!!! (+20.64) | |||||
| Position | |
Cooper DeJean is not my lover | Iceman’s Disciples |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Carson Wentz - MIN | 6.32 | 29.76 | Dak Prescott - DAL |
|
| RB |
|
Jadarian Price - SEA | 5 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN |
|
| RB | 
|
Jacory Croskey-Merritt - WSH | 5.8 | 4.4 | David Montgomery - HOU |
|
| WR |
|
Justin Jefferson - MIN | 8.5 | 14.1 | Christian Watson - GB |
|
| WR |
|
Rome Odunze - CHI | 7.3 | 8.4 | Mike Evans - SF |
|
| WR |
|
Mack Hollins - NE | 3.8 | 21.7 | Stefon Diggs - WSH |
|
| TE |
|
Dalton Schultz - HOU | 26 | 26 | Dalton Schultz - HOU |
|
| K |
|
Harrison Butker - KC | 15 | 12 | Evan McPherson - CIN | 
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 9 | San Francisco 49ers - | ||
| Total | 81.72 | 135.86 | ||||
| Winner | Iceman’s Disciples (+54.14) | |||||
| Position | |
The Jacked Son’s Myth Enigma | Kingpins of Crime |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB | 
|
Jalen Hurts - PHI | 16.16 | 7.88 | Justin Herbert - LAC | 
|
| RB |
|
Breece Hall - NYJ | 14.2 | 23.8 | Kenneth Walker III - KC |
|
| RB |
|
Bucky Irving - TB | 13 | 0 | James Conner - ARI | 
|
| WR |
|
Justin Jefferson - MIN | 8.5 | 6.5 | Ladd McConkey - LAC | 
|
| WR | 
|
Rashid Shaheed - SEA | 11.6 | 7 | Terry McLaurin - WSH |
|
| WR |
|
Dontayvion Wicks - PHI | 12.4 | 5.5 | Courtland Sutton - DEN | 
|
| TE |
|
Mark Andrews - BAL | 10.9 | 14.4 | Tyler Warren - IND | 
|
| K |
|
Cairo Santos - CHI | 0 | 0 | Cameron Dicker - LAC |
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 0 | - | ||
| Total | 90.76 | 65.08 | ||||
| Winner | The Jacked Son’s Myth Enigma (+25.68) | |||||
| Position |  |
The Emotionally Injured Reserve | Dez Still Caught It |  |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Carson Wentz - MIN | 6.32 | 28.48 | Brock Purdy - SF |
|
| RB |
|
Bucky Irving - TB | 13 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN |
|
| RB |
|
Jacory Croskey-Merritt - WSH | 5.8 | 8 | Javonte Williams - DAL |
|
| WR |
|
Justin Jefferson - MIN | 8.5 | -0.1 | DJ Moore - BUF |
|
| WR | 
|
Jameson Williams - DET | 5.3 | 9.4 | Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF |
|
| WR |
|
Terry McLaurin - WSH | 7 | 10.3 | Emeka Egbuka - TB |
|
| TE |
|
Dalton Schultz - HOU | 26 | 22.5 | Dalton Kincaid - BUF |
|
| K |
|
Andy Borregales - NE | 6 | 15 | Harrison Butker - KC |
|
| DEF | New England Patriots - | 20 | 4 | Philadelphia Eagles - | ||
| Total | 97.92 | 108.08 | ||||
| Winner | Dez Still Caught It (+10.16) | |||||
| Position |  |
She Sucks My Boswell | Hock Out With My KOC Out | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Dak Prescott - DAL | 29.76 | 28.48 | Brock Purdy - SF |
|
| RB |
|
Jacory Croskey-Merritt - WSH | 5.8 | 5 | Jadarian Price - SEA |
|
| RB |
|
Travis Etienne Jr. - NO | 7.1 | 3.6 | Rhamondre Stevenson - NE |
|
| WR |
|
Jameson Williams - DET | 5.3 | 9.4 | Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF |
|
| WR |
|
Stefon Diggs - WSH | 21.7 | 9.8 | Matthew Golden - GB |
|
| WR |
|
Mack Hollins - NE | 3.8 | 2.4 | Quentin Johnston - LAC |
|
| TE | 
|
Jake Ferguson - DAL | 20.3 | 5.3 | Michael Mayer - LV |
|
| K | 
|
Eddy Pineiro - SF | 5 | 5 | Eddy Pineiro - SF |
|
| DEF | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | 4 | 9 | San Francisco 49ers - | ||
| Total | 102.76 | 77.98 | ||||
| Winner | She Sucks My Boswell (+24.78) | |||||
| Position | |
Riley Read Option | Endzone Jones | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Brock Purdy - SF | 28.48 | 16.16 | Jalen Hurts - PHI |
|
| RB | 
|
Ashton Jeanty - LV | 10.3 | 5 | Jadarian Price - SEA |
|
| RB |
|
Cam Skattebo - NYG | 9.5 | 23.8 | Kenneth Walker III - KC |
|
| WR |
|
Quentin Johnston - LAC | 2.4 | 10.3 | Emeka Egbuka - TB |
|
| WR | 
|
Xavier Worthy - KC | 13.5 | 21.7 | Stefon Diggs - WSH |
|
| WR |
|
Mike Evans - SF | 8.4 | 35.3 | CeeDee Lamb - DAL |
|
| TE |
|
Trey McBride - ARI | 18.1 | 1.3 | Colston Loveland - CHI |
|
| K |
|
Jason Myers - SEA | 7 | 17 | Brandon Aubrey - DAL | 
|
| DEF | Kansas City Chiefs - | 1 | 9 | Green Bay Packers - | ||
| Total | 98.68 | 139.56 | ||||
| Winner | Endzone Jones (+40.88) | |||||
| Position |  |
Scrantonicity 8 | unbelievably high | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jayden Daniels - WSH | 14.74 | 6.32 | Carson Wentz - MIN |
|
| RB |
|
Christian McCaffrey - SF | 22.6 | 22.6 | Christian McCaffrey - SF |
|
| RB | 
|
De'Von Achane - MIA | 12.3 | 7.1 | Travis Etienne Jr. - NO |
|
| WR |
|
Justin Jefferson - MIN | 8.5 | 8.5 | Justin Jefferson - MIN |
|
| WR |
|
Terry McLaurin - WSH | 7 | 8.8 | Chris Godwin Jr. - TB | 
|
| WR | 
|
Rashee Rice - KC | 12.3 | 8.4 | Mike Evans - SF |
|
| TE |
|
Pat Freiermuth - PIT | 7.4 | 5.9 | T.J. Hockenson - MIN | 
|
| K | 
|
Drew Stevens - WSH | 7 | 7 | Jason Myers - SEA |
|
| DEF | Seattle Seahawks - | 12 | 24 | Carolina Panthers - | ||
| Total | 103.84 | 98.62 | ||||
| Winner | Scrantonicity 8 (+5.22) | |||||
| Position | |
Ward and Peace | Depressed Colts Fan | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jalen Hurts - PHI | 16.16 | 17.02 | C.J. Stroud - HOU | 
|
| RB |
|
Christian McCaffrey - SF | 22.6 | 22.6 | Christian McCaffrey - SF |
|
| RB |
|
Jadarian Price - SEA | 5 | 5 | Jadarian Price - SEA |
|
| WR |
|
Emeka Egbuka - TB | 10.3 | 13.5 | Xavier Worthy - KC |
|
| WR |
|
Christian Watson - GB | 14.1 | 4.1 | Jordan Addison - MIN | 
|
| WR |
|
DK Metcalf - PIT | 6.7 | 6.5 | Ladd McConkey - LAC |
|
| TE | 
|
Dallas Goedert - PHI | 1.4 | 14.4 | Tyler Warren - IND |
|
| K |
|
Brandon Aubrey - DAL | 17 | 10 | Will Reichard - MIN | 
|
| DEF | Philadelphia Eagles - | 4 | 9 | San Francisco 49ers - | ||
| Total | 97.26 | 102.12 | ||||
| Winner | Depressed Colts Fan (+4.86) | |||||
| Position | |
Krusty Krab Pizzas | Pay Day Gray | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB | 
|
Joe Burrow - CIN | 16.18 | 14.74 | Jayden Daniels - WSH |
|
| RB | 
|
Jahmyr Gibbs - DET | 23.3 | 10.5 | Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN |
|
| RB |
|
Christian McCaffrey - SF | 22.6 | 3.6 | J.K. Dobbins - DEN |
|
| WR | 
|
Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET | 35.2 | 6.2 | Luther Burden III - CHI |
|
| WR |
|
CeeDee Lamb - DAL | 35.3 | 8.8 | Chris Godwin Jr. - TB |
|
| WR |
|
Justin Jefferson - MIN | 8.5 | 12.4 | Dontayvion Wicks - PHI |
|
| TE |
|
Colston Loveland - CHI | 1.3 | 26 | Dalton Schultz - HOU |
|
| K |
|
Cameron Dicker - LAC | 0 | 15 | Harrison Butker - KC |
|
| DEF | Houston Texans - | 9 | 9 | San Francisco 49ers - | ||
| Total | 151.38 | 106.24 | ||||
| Winner | Krusty Krab Pizzas (+45.14) | |||||
| Position |  |
Skid Marks | TheNuke | |
||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| QB |
|
Jalen Hurts - PHI | 16.16 | 14.8 | Lamar Jackson - BAL | 
|
| RB |
|
Christian McCaffrey - SF | 22.6 | 11.1 | Bijan Robinson - ATL | 
|
| RB | 
|
Chuba Hubbard - CAR | 14.4 | 17.7 | Derrick Henry - BAL | 
|
| WR |
|
CeeDee Lamb - DAL | 35.3 | 0 | Puka Nacua - LAR | 
|
| WR |
|
Terry McLaurin - WSH | 7 | 42.5 | Jaxon Smith-Njigba - SEA | 
|
| WR |
|
Romeo Doubs - NE | 12.6 | 26.5 | Ja'Marr Chase - CIN | 
|
| TE |
|
Tucker Kraft - GB | 3.5 | 18.1 | Trey McBride - ARI |
|
| K |
|
Brandon Aubrey - DAL | 17 | 0 | Cameron Dicker - LAC |
|
| DEF | San Francisco 49ers - | 9 | 4 | Tampa Bay Buccaneers - | ||
| Total | 137.56 | 134.7 | ||||
| Winner | Skid Marks (+2.86) | |||||
