2026-27 Week 5 Scores

Position Who’s Nailin’ Jalen? Historically Bad at This
QB Jacoby Brissett - ARI 25.28 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB D'Andre Swift - CHI 17.3 7 Chase Brown - CIN
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 13.2 Emanuel Wilson - SEA
WR Mike Evans - SF 26.3 1.6 Carnell Tate - TEN
WR Christian Watson - GB 32.3 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
WR Dohnte Meyers - CIN 12.3 4 Malachi Fields - NYG
TE Brenton Strange - JAX 13.8 7.4 Mike Gesicki - CIN
K Cam Little - JAX 6 6 Dominic Zvada - NYG
DEF New York Jets - NYJ 18 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 188.08 80.76
Winner Who’s Nailin’ Jalen? (+107.32)
Position Kingpins of Crime Freakofnature
QB Josh Allen - BUF 30.5 28.94 Jared Goff - DET
RB Jahmyr Gibbs - DET 37.7 13.2 Emanuel Wilson - SEA
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 15.8 Bijan Robinson - ATL
WR DK Metcalf - PIT 5.3 12.9 Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET
WR Nico Collins - HOU 10.6 11.3 Dontayvion Wicks - PHI
WR Davante Adams - LAR 22.1 0 Brian Thomas Jr. - JAX
TE Mike Gesicki - CIN 7.4 5.6 Juwan Johnson - NO
K Brandon McManus - GB 0 5 Eddy Pineiro - SF
DEF Baltimore Ravens - BAL 4 17.2 Houston Texans - HOU
Total 124.6 109.94
Winner Kingpins of Crime (+14.66)
Position Woke Up and Chose Violence Iceman’s Disciples
QB Jacoby Brissett - ARI 25.28 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB Bhayshul Tuten - JAX 11.6 13.2 Emanuel Wilson - SEA
RB Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN 18.7 4.8 TreVeyon Henderson - NE
WR Matthew Golden - GB 20.3 22.1 Davante Adams - LAR
WR Garrett Wilson - NYJ 23.4 8.9 Luther Burden III - CHI
WR Nico Collins - HOU 10.6 13.6 Denzel Boston - CLE
TE Mike Gesicki - CIN 7.4 32.4 Isaiah Likely - NYG
K Spencer Shrader - IND 21 21 Spencer Shrader - IND
DEF Houston Texans - HOU 17.2 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 155.48 150.28
Winner Woke Up and Chose Violence (+5.2)
Position Endzone Jones Hock Out With My KOC Out
QB Jared Goff - DET 28.94 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 8.3 Will Shipley - PHI
RB Bijan Robinson - ATL 15.8 17.3 D'Andre Swift - CHI
WR Nico Collins - HOU 10.6 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
WR Ja'Marr Chase - CIN 19.7 4.2 Tee Higgins - CIN
WR Jameson Williams - DET 18.7 18.7 Jameson Williams - DET
TE Sam LaPorta - DET 19.8 1.7 T.J. Hockenson - MIN
K Dominic Zvada - NYG 6 7 Evan McPherson - CIN
DEF Cleveland Browns - CLE 11 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 167.34 98.76
Winner Endzone Jones (+68.58)
Position The Good Guys Pay Day Gray
QB Jordan Love - GB 25.28 20.94 C.J. Stroud - HOU
RB Jahmyr Gibbs - DET 37.7 18.6 Braelon Allen - NYJ
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 8 Quinshon Judkins - CLE
WR Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET 12.9 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
WR Wan'Dale Robinson - TEN 11.3 3.6 Tre' Harris - LAC
WR Christian Watson - GB 32.3 12.2 Terry McLaurin - WSH
TE Tyler Warren - IND 21.4 21.5 Pat Freiermuth - PIT
K Brandon Aubrey - DAL 5 16 Will Reichard - MIN
DEF Houston Texans - HOU 17.2 3 Washington Commanders - WSH
Total 170.08 111.12
Winner The Good Guys (+58.96)
Position Southport Skegs Ocean’s 9
QB Jared Goff - DET 28.94 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB Kyren Williams - LAR 19.6 13.2 Emanuel Wilson - SEA
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 12 Keaton Mitchell - LAC
WR Michael Wilson - ARI 7.28 6.1 Antonio Williams - WSH
WR DK Metcalf - PIT 5.3 7.7 Keon Coleman - BUF
WR Denzel Boston - CLE 13.6 37.7 Puka Nacua - LAR
TE Tyler Warren - IND 21.4 7.4 Mike Gesicki - CIN
K Will Reichard - MIN 16 5 Eddy Pineiro - SF
DEF Cincinnati Bengals - CIN 9 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 128.12 123.38
Winner Southport Skegs (+4.74)
Position Jordan Loves Younghoes hancocky bastards
QB Trevor Lawrence - JAX 21.74 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB MarShawn Lloyd - GB 16.7 7 Chase Brown - CIN
RB Bucky Irving - TB 31.5 2.2 Jeremiyah Love - ARI
WR Drake London - ATL 18.8 5.3 DK Metcalf - PIT
WR DJ Moore - BUF 0 8.9 Luther Burden III - CHI
WR Rashid Shaheed - SEA 12.9 1.5 KC Concepcion - CLE
TE Juwan Johnson - NO 5.6 32.4 Isaiah Likely - NYG
K Cam Little - JAX 6 21 Spencer Shrader - IND
DEF Jacksonville Jaguars - JAX 6 3 Washington Commanders - WSH
Total 119.24 106.58
Winner Jordan Loves Younghoes (+12.66)
Position The Emotionally Injured Reserve Skid Marks
QB Dak Prescott - DAL 12.64 20.94 C.J. Stroud - HOU
RB David Montgomery - HOU 1.1 11.2 Jonathan Taylor - IND
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 36.8 Jaylen Warren - PIT
WR CeeDee Lamb - DAL 2.9 12.9 Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET
WR Devaughn Vele - NO 6.6 8.9 Luther Burden III - CHI
WR Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET 12.9 9.3 Makai Lemon - PHI
TE Mike Gesicki - CIN 7.4 21.6 Trey McBride - ARI
K Brandon Aubrey - DAL 5 14 Tyler Loop - BAL
DEF Houston Texans - HOU 17.2 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 102.54 144.64
Winner Skid Marks (+42.1)
Position The Jacked Son’s Myth Enigma Up!!!
QB Joe Burrow - CIN 24.6 25.74 Jameis Winston - NYG
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 7 Chase Brown - CIN
RB TreVeyon Henderson - NE 4.8 16.7 MarShawn Lloyd - GB
WR Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET 12.9 22.1 Davante Adams - LAR
WR DK Metcalf - PIT 5.3 3.4 Kalif Raymond - CHI
WR Dohnte Meyers - CIN 12.3 4.2 Tee Higgins - CIN
TE Harold Fannin Jr. - CLE 1.4 4.8 Mark Andrews - BAL
K Chris Boswell - PIT 13 21 Spencer Shrader - IND
DEF Denver Broncos - DEN 22.7 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 133.8 113.94
Winner The Jacked Son’s Myth Enigma (+19.86)
Position Game of Lan All You Need is (Jeremiyah) Love
QB Matthew Stafford - LAR 27.32 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 19.6 Kyren Williams - LAR
RB Rhamondre Stevenson - NE 17.5 17.3 D'Andre Swift - CHI
WR Mike Evans - SF 26.3 29.1 Malik Nabers - NYG
WR Nico Collins - HOU 10.6 7.5 Deebo Samuel Sr. - SF
WR Josh Downs - IND 7.7 20.3 Matthew Golden - GB
TE Harold Fannin Jr. - CLE 1.4 19.8 Sam LaPorta - DET
K Cam Little - JAX 6 1 Chad Ryland - ARI
DEF Denver Broncos - DEN 22.7 17.2 Houston Texans - HOU
Total 156.32 157.08
Winner All You Need is (Jeremiyah) Love (+0.76)
Position She Sucks My Boswell Zurich Fins
QB Matthew Stafford - LAR 27.32 28.94 Jared Goff - DET
RB Jonathan Taylor - IND 11.2 7 Chase Brown - CIN
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 13.2 Emanuel Wilson - SEA
WR Josh Downs - IND 7.7 12.9 Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET
WR Michael Wilson - ARI 7.28 20.3 Matthew Golden - GB
WR Davante Adams - LAR 22.1 13.6 Denzel Boston - CLE
TE Sam LaPorta - DET 19.8 1.4 Harold Fannin Jr. - CLE
K Matt Gay - LV 3 5 Brandon Aubrey - DAL
DEF New York Jets - NYJ 18 17.2 Houston Texans - HOU
Total 123.4 119.54
Winner She Sucks My Boswell (+3.86)
Position Daejon’s Deceivers Cooper DeJean is not my lover
QB Jacoby Brissett - ARI 25.28 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB Emanuel Wilson - SEA 13.2 17.3 D'Andre Swift - CHI
RB Aaron Jones Sr. - MIN 18.7 17.5 Rhamondre Stevenson - NE
WR Denzel Boston - CLE 13.6 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
WR Christian Watson - GB 32.3 3.6 Tre' Harris - LAC
WR Tre' Harris - LAC 3.6 0 Roman Wilson - PIT
TE Sam LaPorta - DET 19.8 19.8 Sam LaPorta - DET
K Will Reichard - MIN 16 8 Wil Lutz - DEN
DEF Cincinnati Bengals - CIN 9 11 Cleveland Browns - CLE
Total 151.48 109.76
Winner Daejon’s Deceivers (+41.72)
Position unbelievably high Dez Still Caught It
QB Jacoby Brissett - ARI 25.28 27.32 Matthew Stafford - LAR
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 36.8 Jaylen Warren - PIT
RB Braelon Allen - NYJ 18.6 14.8 Ollie Gordon II - MIA
WR Michael Wilson - ARI 7.28 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
WR Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET 12.9 18.7 Jameson Williams - DET
WR Jameson Williams - DET 18.7 11 Khalil Shakir - BUF
TE Trey McBride - ARI 21.6 32.4 Isaiah Likely - NYG
K Cameron Dicker - LAC 6 10 Tyler Bass - BUF
DEF New York Jets - NYJ 18 17.2 Houston Texans - HOU
Total 135.36 175.5
Winner Dez Still Caught It (+40.14)
Position Scrantonicity 8 TheNuke
QB Josh Allen - BUF 30.5 25.28 Jacoby Brissett - ARI
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 14.2 Javonte Williams - DAL
RB Jonathan Taylor - IND 11.2 8 Quinshon Judkins - CLE
WR Puka Nacua - LAR 37.7 10.6 Nico Collins - HOU
WR Nico Collins - HOU 10.6 29.1 Malik Nabers - NYG
WR DK Metcalf - PIT 5.3 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
TE Chig Okonkwo - WSH 10 7.4 Mike Gesicki - CIN
K Chris Boswell - PIT 13 6 Cam Little - JAX
DEF Houston Texans - HOU 17.2 9 Cincinnati Bengals - CIN
Total 172.3 116.86
Winner Scrantonicity 8 (+55.44)
Position Riley Read Option H-O-T-T-O-DEEBO
QB Jared Goff - DET 28.94 27.32 Matthew Stafford - LAR
RB D'Andre Swift - CHI 17.3 17.3 D'Andre Swift - CHI
RB Emanuel Wilson - SEA 13.2 0.7 RJ Harvey - DEN
WR Drake London - ATL 18.8 7.28 Michael Wilson - ARI
WR Jaylen Waddle - DEN 4.8 22.1 Davante Adams - LAR
WR Malik Nabers - NYG 29.1 0 Roman Wilson - PIT
TE Mark Andrews - BAL 4.8 1.7 T.J. Hockenson - MIN
K Nick Folk - ATL 12 8 Wil Lutz - DEN
DEF Denver Broncos - DEN 22.7 17.2 Houston Texans - HOU
Total 151.64 101.6
Winner Riley Read Option (+50.04)
Position Eating Poop @ The Eagles Parade Depressed Colts Fan
QB Joe Burrow - CIN 24.6 28.94 Jared Goff - DET
RB Quinshon Judkins - CLE 8 7 Chase Brown - CIN
RB Will Shipley - PHI 8.3 7.1 Cam Skattebo - NYG
WR Tee Higgins - CIN 4.2 10.6 Nico Collins - HOU
WR Romeo Doubs - NE 2.6 32.3 Christian Watson - GB
WR Roman Wilson - PIT 0 12.9 Amon-Ra St. Brown - DET
TE Pat Freiermuth - PIT 21.5 21.6 Trey McBride - ARI
K Joey Slye - TEN 3 1 Chad Ryland - ARI
DEF Arizona Cardinals - ARI -3 22.7 Denver Broncos - DEN
Total 69.2 144.14
Winner Depressed Colts Fan (+74.94)
Position Ward and Peace Krusty Krab Pizzas
QB C.J. Stroud - HOU 20.94 10.24 Justin Herbert - LAC
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 21 Derrick Henry - BAL
RB Tony Pollard - TEN 5.2 4.9 Omarion Hampton - LAC
WR Jaylen Waddle - DEN 4.8 0 DeVonta Smith - PHI
WR Michael Wilson - ARI 7.28 29.1 Malik Nabers - NYG
WR Matthew Golden - GB 20.3 4.8 Jaylen Waddle - DEN
TE Isaiah Likely - NYG 32.4 19.8 Sam LaPorta - DET
K Ka'imi Fairbairn - HOU 17 6 Cam Little - JAX
DEF Houston Texans - HOU 17.2 22.7 Denver Broncos - DEN
Total 132.12 118.54
Winner Ward and Peace (+13.58)
Position The Culver’s Less Traveled By Beaver Blitz
QB Jared Goff - DET 28.94 30.5 Josh Allen - BUF
RB Chase Brown - CIN 7 21 Derrick Henry - BAL
RB Jaylen Warren - PIT 36.8 37.7 Jahmyr Gibbs - DET
WR Michael Wilson - ARI 7.28 10.6 Nico Collins - HOU
WR Parker Washington - JAX 30.4 5 Rome Odunze - CHI
WR Carnell Tate - TEN 1.6 14.6 Zay Flowers - BAL
TE Sam LaPorta - DET 19.8 3.9 Colston Loveland - CHI
K Cam Little - JAX 6 10 Tyler Bass - BUF
DEF Cincinnati Bengals - CIN 9 11 Detroit Lions - DET
Total 146.82 144.3
Winner The Culver’s Less Traveled By (+2.52)