Highest Scorer
In the 3rd closest matchup of the week, Boswell edged a win over our European brother-in-arms. The obvious hero of Kenneth’s team is Mr. Nacua, who has the 4th most targets in the league, despite missing two weeks. Elsewhere, middling players got the job done. When your defense, kicker, tight end, and WR #3 can all score 15+, you’re cooking for a good week. Even with a lackluster Nabers performance, Boswell got it done!
I’ve sent the payment. Today, Kenneth, you are a rich man.
Biggest Blowout
I typically don’t languish in the no-shows — mostly because we’ve been so fortunate to not have many of late. However, this is the second time it’s happened this season, and by the same team, to boot. The fall from grace has been preciptious and rushed for hancocky bastards who I will remind everyone WON THE WHOLE LEAGUE not a few years ago. She is a fantasy force to be reckoned with, when she logs a roster, that is. And predictably, this was a beatable lineup if there ever was one. Younghoes got off lucky, only tallying the 28th most points in the league this week. Andie would’ve beat this team if she threw blind darts at a draftboard.
Nonetheless, I’ve issued the $15 fine. It will be compiled for the Divisional payments. And all those 0’s further anchor the bastards down in the dregs of our Playoff Watch.
Closest Call
A tough, tough loss for the D-E-E-B-O squad. When Chase goes nuclear for 10 catches and 155 yards with a score, you SHOULD NOT LOSE! However, aside from #1 on the Bengals, only two other people scored double-digit points (Rice, so close with 9.9). What truly smarts is the lack of production from Marks and Singletary. Singletary especially seemed poised to make noise, with sole possession of the backfield against a fireselling Eagles Defense.
However, in the grand scheme of late-game points, Fannin’s 39-yard touchdown catch trumps Flournoy’s 46-yard gain to put Dallas in a winning position.
Best Find: C.J Stroud , played by 1 team (35.36 points); Statline: 21-35 for 384 yards and 5 touchdowns, 1 interception; 2-20 on the ground
Holy mama. There hasn’t been a lot of room (or reason) to talk about the Los Angeles Chargers in the write-ups, but Stroud gives us egress to discuss the catastrophe, the embarrassment, the unmitigated conflagration that is those 53-rostered “athletes” and the coaching staff.
Stroud obliterated the Chargers, torching them at 11 yards a clip. Every time he completed a pass, he reset the downs. And he spread the ball too — Kayshon Boutte, Nico Collins, Xavier Hutchinson, and even Tank “John Wick: I’m thinkin’ I’m back” Dell caught a touchdown, smoking the Bolts in their home stadium.
Stroud has been ON FIRE. He’s 7th in the league in both passing yards and touchdowns (having already played his bye). Moreover, it seems like the Chargers are the team to play against. Just pitiful, the 0-8, dumb Chargers.
Biggest Bust: D’Andre Swift , played by 5 teams (3.1 points); Statline: 12-31 on the ground
Swift is the first player to reach 10 rushing touchdowns — despite being 14th in total rushing yards. And that illustrates his complete dominance over the 1st half of this NFL season. The Bears don’t care. They’ll give the kid the rock 30 times a game, and in the end zone every chance they get.
Yet in Primetime against the newly vaunted Buccs D, the Swift couldn’t get it done. Stymied for just a putrid 31 total yards, he couldn’t get any momentum. It’s probably not his fault, though; his compatriot, Caleb Williams, threw a jaw-dropping quantity of FOUR picks in the game. Hard to establish the ground game if you’re air-mailing the possession to your opponent. Nevertheless, Swift snakebit the 5 teams he played against — who surely thought they were getting a multi-score week, only to be considered lucky they got a multi-point performance.
